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Imperfectly Unbalanced

I'm writing this whilst sitting on a park bench watching the girls play, making slow progress but progress all the same.

It's 4.30pm on a sunny Monday afternoon and it's been one of those very rare days where I feel rather smug at having nailed the balance between work and life.

Ironically I've had this general blog post topic in my head for quite a while now but haven't had the chance (or made the time, to be fair) to actually write it. The whole idea of time management is not something I'm great at, working from home I find it very difficult sometimes to set the boundaries.

Like I said, this feeling is usually a rather elusive one.

I find the work/life balance concept a difficult one to grasp. It's normally life that tips the scales though and work takes a back seat in favour of time with the girls and trying to keep on top of the housework and the never ending pile of washing. The problem with working from home is that all of the work that needs done around the house is never out of sight, or mind, and more often than not, right in my way and therefore prioritised over work that could be getting done but doesn't have a particular deadline and therefore can be pushed to the side.

It makes progress a little slow at times and can make the idea of expansion or new ideas a bit overwhelming.

For the most part, I make items to order (memory bears and such) and unless I have something specific, like a craft fair, coming up I don't tend to make things up just to have in stock. I do have a small amount of listings in an Etsy shop but it doesn't seem to do much for me so I mostly stick to custom orders.

I usually find that I'll go for a while without any orders and then get a number in at once and unless I'm extremely busy or not available, I try not to let people down. These are the weeks where the house falls apart and the mum-guilt is overwhelming.

I thrive on the buzz of it though, getting people's orders made, wrapped up and sent off gives me a wonderful sense of fulfillment, pride and accomplishment that, yes, I can do this. I can be home for my girls, help them with homeworks and tuck them into bed whilst also providing for them financially and keeping my own self-worth intact.

I feel like I personally, need my creative outlet to keep me sane, even though sometimes it drives me towards insanity.

I know that once Aryah heads off to begin her academic journey it will all become a little easier. I'll have the opportunity to create a bit more structure to my day and balance the scales a bit better but for now I am blissfully winging it.

I think as parents all we can do is try our best and do what we think is right for us and our families and whether we work full-time, part-time, work from home or are stay at home parents, the struggle is real.

The balance is hard to strike and parental guilt and bouts of temporary insanity come with the territory.

Jo xx

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